Wear an Orange Hat, It’s Tax Season

(I bought it, now can I break it? Or: taxes, pie, and PBS)

Here’s an unpopular opinion: I don’t object, per se, to the idea of taxes. 

Caesar’s due aside, by preference and philosophy I lean toward intentional social support systems as key to any society where people can flourish and maintain the social fabric. Such systems don’t run on “Live. Laugh. Love.” posters alone. 

This time of year, however (Tax Season in the U.S.A.; like hunting season, except wearing orange won’t prevent you from taking a hit) – I feel some discomfort at the intersection of my civic fiscal duty and my attempts at somewhat responsible consumption. 

I mean, I’m paying for this…what is it, again? (We’ll play it easy and just shop the dictionary’s “A” section: “abysmal,” “appalling,” “atrocity”…) 

Anyways, though no contracts for exchange of goods or services were signed, by dint of dropping tax dollars I’m a demi-fraction of a co-owner of….this. (Vaguely gestures at the news, the government, and horrifically inhumane and unjust circumstances at home and abroad.) 

And I’m not sure I want it, in its current form. 

To clarify, I do want it, but only in a very revised version; or at the very least, I want to be able to cherry pick. 

Cherry picking is usually a bad thing. But in this one instance? I want to choose precisely what my taxes support. 

How could this work? A little minor fantastical tax system reform; nothing major, like letting go 25,000 IRS workers…

In the spirit of completely pie-in-the-sky ideas, my proposed tax system would show taxpayers a pie chart representing the sum of their owed taxes. This pie chart would have a section for each major area of government expenditure: Social Security, National Defense, etc. The taxpayer could then adjust this chart to determine how much of their taxes supported each area. 

The final allocations would have to be weighed to balance for different tax burdens; but in theory, by enabling taxpayers to directly steer tax dollars toward or away from programs, individuals would have far greater control over policy than by simply voting for elected officials. 

Furthermore, since participation would be linked to the process of submitting taxes, it would kneecap the question of anemic voter turnout. 

It would also force programs to clearly justify and substantiate the benefits they provide, and account for their use of funds, in order to compete for the next year’s budget. 

And since taxation occurs yearly, public feedback on the past year’s performance would be timely, and less possible to brush off as partisan or special interest. 

Are there gaping holes in my logic? Absolutely. (For starters, many necessary programs are effective enough to not be noticed until they’re gone.) 

Is this possibly an escapist fantasy constructed to address my moral horror at being implicated by citizenship in enabling stunning military aggression, global destabilization, and disaster enacted upon countless innocent civilian lives – while being powerless to fix it? 

Why yes. 

Do I see any off-ramp for this feedback system, in which all possible checks have been removed or rendered ineffective? 

None at all. There’s no good ending, under current circumstances. Hoping for a heart attack only makes room for the next worst-in-line. Hoping for an election just hides the only race happening – the race to the money. 

And at the end of the day, I’ll admit: I’m completely unsuited to any decision-making in today’s world. 

To wit: I would happily dump all my (small amount of) taxes into programs such as the now-defunct Corporation for Public Broadcasting. The Corporation was responsible for funding PBS, which will forever hold a special place in my heart as the home of Sesame Street – the show that championed community, learning, social responsibility, and kindness, and therefore did a completely inadequate job of preparing me for this world I now live in. 

Now I’m off to spend my remaining post-tax pennies on an organic cotton, naturally-dyed, locally-produced Sticker Shock Orange baseball cap. In case it helps with whatever comes next – this “Tax Season” and beyond.



Published by Marushka

I dream curiosity and write words that change brains.

2 thoughts on “Wear an Orange Hat, It’s Tax Season

  1. Funny, sharp, and a little too real. I mostly agree. In an actual system, I’d want some minimum funding protections for essential programs, along with a default pie setup for people who don’t have the time or desire to research where every dollar should go. But after that, yes gladly strip every possible cent of my tax money from the military, police, ICE, and the endless sludge of corporate welfare.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much for reading! Yes, as a practical implementation it would be about as useful as a damp Kleenex razor. There’s simply too much gap between the actual dollar amount paid in taxes between the top income brackets and everyone else (different from % of income). And too many programs perform useful functions but also have pork wrapped up in them; or take a while to show “results” (i.e. many crucial public health initiatives). But yes, I can’t stand the thought of paying taxes to support any military action, and particularly the current situation.

      In terms of the broader scope of policy affecting this stuff, and hyperbole aside – I think the number one most effective thing would be repealing Citizens United, because it would help recalibrate campaign and policymaking away from monolithic interests. As it is, we’ve lost all brakes on the system.

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